I made this post for 2 reasons. 1: i really felt like doing it. 2: People might wonder why im not acting like im used to. This is why.
From here on im gonna be a real happy person. Today just i realized just how awesome my life is, and its all thanks to a girl named anastacia. She was the first love ive ever had, and it changed me big time. Before i met her i was just trying to fit in with assholes at school putting on a fake act. Well no more. I even used to think love was fake and didn't exist, but she changed my mind big time. When i met her, I went from a guy with not many emotions, to a guy with alot of emotions. Because of this, I suddenly started to think alot about my life, and i thought it sucked because i had worries.
(About anastacia. No me and her aren't girlfriend boyfriend going out or anything, but were best friends. She knows all of my secrets and i know all of hers. She knows i love her and she loves me to but its just a brother sister kind of love. Shes the most trustworthy person i know. If it wasn't for her this realization wouldn't have happened. Im so glad i met her.)
I worried about things like my future and having nowhere to go because i already know im gonna fail high school miserably. I just can't focus on work. its a problem ill never be able to fix. The other thing i worried about was growing up without enough friends. Well, true friends that is. The type of friends who are with you until the end. The kind of friends you can share all your deep dark secrets with without fear of them judging you. After so long i finally have some of these friends, and having them has really changed me. Its made me a more kind and sensitive person, but in turn it caused all these worries i spoke of to kick up.
Today after going to anastacias house, on the car ride home, all the worries finally went away and i realized how awesome my life is. Although i already know im never gonna graduate from high school, i have 4 friends who say that if i had nowhere to go, i could go live with them. (Friends being, anastacia, mellisa, dakota, and icycrew) when i told my mom about my friends telling me this, she said i wouldn't even HAVE to do this because shed let me stay with her forever, which is probably how its gonna end up. Right there and then all of my worries just went and dissolved. disappeared. Right then i actually realized that i already DO have enough true friends as it is, AND on top of this im a sophomore in high school and i still have 2 more years to make even MORE true friends.
UPDATE: Speaking of which i met yet another one. (I thought it would never happen) Another girl as cool and trustworthy as anastacia. Her names mellisa. Shes the cutest girl ever and me her and anastacia meet up before school, twice in the middle of school, and once after school. Hanging out with them is great. Makes me happy. It makes me extremely happy when i get hugs from them both everytime we meet. :3 (Im such a nerd lma) All 3 of us share a deep secret that just makes our bond even tighter.
No matter what anyone says now, i know my life is great in my eyes. Im finally happy. And i will be for a long time. Wow ive never made a post like this before. I already imagine either trolls or just plain assholes coming here mocking me for this post, calling me an emotion faggot and such, but i don't care. I know theres people out there who understand this or can relate.
Ok thats all. For some reason i just had this big temptation to put this out there. Everyone who was blocked from PMing me or Commenting on my userpage is unbanned now because of my new look on life and change of attitude.
If you know won't like this new side of me then you better just stop communicating with me all together because we won't get along anymore.
What even adds more to my happiness is that i was able to make our slow computer extremely fast. Oh yes.
UPDATE: Uploaded a pic of myself here on NG. Im really out of my mind. Its an OK pic but its the best ill probably ever be able to take. I suck at taking pics.
Kingdom Hearts 2 is so awesome. And so is this song from it.
ON A SIDENOTE: For some reason since ive met melissa and anastacia, ive lost the urge and need to jerk off. As i post this update ive gone 11 days without jerking off. Its so weird, but i think i know why. I think its because now ive seen girls as something more than just sex, ive seen them as opportunities for great friendships that can last a long time. Girls like these are hard to come by. So hard.